Its a little strange to be back home after going to New York for the final interviews for Matrix Spread the Love 2013. This whole weekend seems to have been a dream and the day I arrived seems like such a long time ago. I added so many new family members, planted seeds for the future, comforted others who needed it and praised others who deserved it. I learned from the top people in my industry and I don't even have my cosmetology license, yet.
I went to New York thinking it would be great to win, but I told myself I would be completely happy being in the top 20 and benefiting from all the education and connections we would receive and make, respectively, over the weekend. One thing I didn't prepare for was REALLY wanting to win. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't have entered if I didn't want to win, but I am finding that I am a VERY competitive person and really would have liked to win this opportunity.
Well, I didn't win and you know what?
Why am I okay?
I was me, I was real and I was honest. I didn't go in trying to make anyone feel sorry for me or trying to sell a fake bill of goods. [Please know that I'm not insinuating anyone else did, I'm simply speaking for myself.] I did the best I could and said what I said because I believe the words coming out of my mouth and it turned out I wasn't what they were looking for and that's okay.
Its okay that I didn't win one of the six spots travelling the United States and instantly becoming an industry icon because I won in other ways. I won myself back.
A long time ago, I lost my way and couldn't quite get a footing in life. I was asleep, but now I am wide awake. Yes, I was a sleeping giant. This weekend I came out of hibernation broke through my own fears and perceptions. Only God can stop me now. Matrix, Penrose Academy, Casa de Cristo Church and Apostolic Center, the officer that stopped me three and a half years ago and my family all woke me up. This was the village it took to raise me back up and it all came to a head this weekend when I found, once again, what of what it is I am capable. That is worth more than any prize or cash value because from now on, I will always have me.
For a while I had wondered why there weren't more people I know applying for this opportunity, but I found that uncertainty, opening yourself up to be compared to other and being subject to rejection are very difficult things to face. I faced all of these things and now I'm even better than I was before. You can do this too.
In addition to all this, I receive education from Nicholas French, Brian and Sandra Smith, Daniel Roldan, Ammon Carver and Chrystopher Benson.
Chrystopher Benson even went so far as to let me know he was impressed by the fact that I still cut hair, even though I have tremors.
I learned a new color technique from Chrystopher Benson, a new haircutting techinique from Brian Smith (oh, and he even gave me the mannequin he was using to demonstrate), I receive more education in blowdrying from Ammon Carver and was given insight as to how Nicholas French produces looks for NAHA.
I'll be here all night writing about all the people I met from Matrix/L'Oreal and modernsalon.com and the previous Matrix Spread the Love winners, but I will say that it was a wonderful experience meeting everyone else who were finalists. Not only did I add a great many people to my family, I had the chance to be inspired and reminded who I am and "Imagine All You Can Be."
Oh, and I can't finish without mentioning Dr. Lew! Dr. Lew was wonderful and inspiring, well everyone was inspiring, but we were informed that this was a rare appearance.
So, if you were a contestant, a judge, a winner, a previous winner or an educator from Matrix, I want to thank you for the role you played in changing me these last few days.
The last thing I want to say is, if you are considering applying for 2014, DO IT! Its okay to be afraid, new things can be scary and the benefits are immeasurable.