Friday, June 13, 2008

We've Moved In

So this week, we finally closed on the house. I'm so happy to no longer be homeless. It's a great feeling. I'm also very happy to be around my parents again. I started a new workout regimen, P90X. It's pretty darn awesome, I think it's really going to whip my butt into shape. I did yesterday's and today's workouts and I'm excited to see how I look come September. I feel so good about myself having some the two workouts.

On a side note, I've gone to lunch with my friend Mike, a few times. Mike is a friend of mine who's had some pretty bad luck in the last few years. It came up in coversation that he looked up an old friend who had once emailed him to tell him they would no longer be friends. I mentioned how that happens to him more than with anybody else I know. It's like his friends are in third grade telling him they don't want to be his friend anymore. Mike is a 52-year old white gay male with a body that must have been carved by the hand of God. He's not obvious about his sexuality, in fact, if I didn't know him so well, I would doubt he were gay at all. Mike is regular guy. He enjoys fitness and loves exercising.
On Tuesday, Mike was telling me that a straight friend of his was starting a new "business opportunity." I told him it sounds like something for which I would see a paper sign by the side of the road that sits about 3" above the ground. "Work from home!" One of those things. Mike said that he was glad we were going to lunch because it got him out of his friend's presentation. He said he'd told this guy that he couldn't meet him because he was meeting someone else. The guy told him to bring me along. Mike told the guy that he didn't think I would be interested in it. He was right.

Anyway, Mike later sends me the following email (I did get his permission first):

Hi Alfonzo,
I'm beginning to think everybody in the world is a little crazy. You know my friend Jason that wanted to talk to me about "getting rich quick" and wanted to involve you this moring over lunch? He comes over my house about an hour ago. It tuns out he's involved in a multi-level marketing scheme. A pyramid. You sign up to this "Bio-Gen" company, which only exists online, and give them your credit card number. They automatically enroll you for a $60 deduction for a bottle of "colon-cleaner" or some other odd health pill that you're required to buy and gets sent to you each month Now your job is to sign up 3 people. They sign up 3 people and you get a $1,110 Visa prepaid card every month. That's your commission. If you sign up more than 3 people they take out $120 from your account and you get a VISA card for $2,000 minus $120. But they are only gift cards. You can't withdraw cash out of a gift-card, which is what I tried to tell Jason.You can't invest that money in a !RA account. You can't take it out for cash in an emergency.
He got mad at me and said "Are you trying to tell me that you can't use a VISA card with $1,100 on it each month to buy things? I told him, no, frankly the money would be much more beneficial to me if it were cash in my account. I earned it. Why can't I have it that way? And what company makes me pay "them" each month before I get my commissoin check? I can't pay my mortgage with a credit card. I can't pay my utilities with a gift card, etc.. I can't invest that money or pay down my bank loan. It's like buying one of the credit cards in a grocery store as a gift for someone. That's nice and all but not useful unless you have something specific to buy with it. AND it's all taxed 50% at the end of the year!
Jason, got real mad at me. I could see his face getting red. He unplugged his computer, told me I was so skeptical and negative he doesn't know why he even bothered coming by! Then he slammed his laptop shut and stormed out of the house without even saying a word. It is me! I'm convinced! I'm going on Oprah or Dr. Phil to talk about my unique human experience in my ability to alienate people.
My question is this: Can I count this experience as another kiss-off email from a friend like I'm so used to getting since it was in person and not via email??? LOL.! Man, I give! I'll tell you this...the more I'm around people the more I love my dog = )

MIKE

My Response:

I think you attract wierdos.

Can I post this on my blog?

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