Chongalicious

The Chonga: 1. hair tied together like a ponytail, usually at the top of a hispanic (usually mexican) girl's head. 

2. A hispanic girl (usually hanging around Echo Park or some other location near dwelling places of many Hispanics, like Miami, or Phoenix, or the Bronx) who wear her hair in a chonga.

I was at our Storm Car Wash last Saturday when an old frat brother of mine, Andy, mentioned a video on youtube call Chongalicious.  It reminded me of grade and high school when all the girl had their bangs curled over their foreheads or split down the middle or completely pulled back with the rest of their hair, which was slicked back into a ponytail on top of or near the back of the top of their head.  My little sister was really the only one of my sisters who was guilty of this offense.  Then again, she used to wear sweats and t-shirts to school every day.  I guess she saw no reason to hide from guys what they were going to get in ten year's time.  It could have also been that she was prone to getting into fights (usually with more than one person at the same time).   

This one goes out to all my chongas locas cruisin' at the Car Show.

Damn It, Jay!

Earlier this week I decided I should stop working out with Tony because it's at midnight and screws up my sleep and makes me late for work all the time. I've yet to tell him this, though. Anyway, I've been getting to work late everyday and my boss hasn't really said much about it, but I know it bugs him like mad.
Last night I decide to skip my late night workout and go to bed super early, like 8pm. I fell asleep and that was great! Come 9:30PM a text message wakes me up:

FYI Dublin gay pride run June 13-22


Woohoo!
_____________________________
From: Jay

Here is my thought when I wake up...GRRR.....

I tried to get back to sleep and couldn't. I decided I would take a Zyrtec because they always put me to sleep. I took one of those around 11PM. Still no sleep. Around midnight, I decide to make some chamomile tea. At this p0int, I found that "Gentlemen Prefer Blondes" was on Turner Classic Movies so it wasn't a total disappointment. I Didn't realize Balenciaga had been around since the 50's (or before). By 1AM I decided to make some more chamomile tea. Still no sleep. Hey there's Marylin Monroe performing "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend." "Tiffany's, Cartier, Harry Winston......," that's been stuck in my head all morning. Actually made start thinking about that 2 carat, very high-quality diamond I've been wanting........a big, TACKY diamond.....back to my story. I finally fall asleep around 2am and when I wake up this morning I DID NOT WANT TO GET UP. I finally got my ass out of bed around 10 am and didn't make it to work by noon. By this time I'm thinking boss man is going to kill me......he didn't.....at least not today.

I should have just gone to the gym.

African Booty Scratcher

Today, I was watching TV and was trying to find something to watch.  I came across HBO signature and saw "African Booty Scratcher."  I went about an other channel further when I wondered if I was what I really thought I saw.  I went back and I was right.  My mind didn't deceive me.  Turns out it was a pretty decent short film about a girl from West Africa who had to choose a prom dress to please her mother's roots as well as please her American tastes.  In the end, she comes out in this really cool green dress that mixes the two.  You may say the dress was hideous, but as any drag queen (or Christian Siriano) might tell you, it was FIERCE!

On a side note, I was listening to the radio and heard something about "Find out how you can enter to win a Laura Ashley inspired PT Cruiser."  I'm getting rigor mortis death chills just thinking about how that might look.  Either one is pretty repulsive on their own.

Mama Cass, Mama Cass

http://youtube.com/watch?v=3sO46RqQNuE

My title makes me think of Mama Cass son from "Beautiful Thing." The only exception is I'm wearing a my mother's bright yellow panty hose on my head in place of a blonde wig, just like Leah. "Don't ever let the light leeeeeave you."

Today I had an other coaching session with Micheal Losier. I think I'll refer to him as Mike, now. I was so nervous on that phone call. As I mentioned before, he has a show with Oprah, so that means he must be highly influential and wealthy. He told me to think of him as a friend. Considering what he is doing for me, he definitely is a friend. He would have to be to keep offering his very expensive services for free. Anyway, he helped me refocus my energy on things that I want by being greatful for the things that I already have and to remember that I am constantly receives "abundances" on a consistent basis. Well, by the time I got off the phone call I felt like my skin was going to explode right off my body, my enery was so focused. He even asked if I had a partner. I said no, he said say to yourself, I have the perfect partner. He then told me I have to believe what I am saying. I mentioned I think of myself at the perfect partner and he told me that was a whole different problem altogether. I decided to change my thoughts, and focus on attracting more personal wealth. I am very greatful to have received what I received today. Tomorrow I will have even more that I have today.

On to Jay's birthday dinner. That was FUN! Jay, Tony's partner (my workout partner and rugby teammate) turned 43 yesterday. Incidently, it was also Joan Crawford's 100th birthday. At point someone asked how old Mike was and I suggested counting the rings around his butthole. There were also a few sad queens sitting at the table behind us and they really had nothing of value to say about anything. We were all very happy when they left.
Oh, did I mention how Jay HATES having happy birthday sung to him. Well, they did it. And earlier when the server asked for his name, I told them it was Va-Jay-Jay. So when they sang to him they sung happyt birthday to Jay-Jay. He HATED, and that made the rest of us SO happy.

Once again, Happy Birthday, here's to becoming a crusty old queen!

Shut Up and Do It

Today, I had a wonderful conversation with superstar Law of Attraction Pracitioner Michael Losier. He has a show on the Oprah Station on XM Radio. He usually charges $500 for a coaching session, but since I attracted it, it cost me nothing but responsibility that comes with improving myself. I know I'm getting better every day, and my life is getting better every day. That's why I changed the name of my blog from "The Life of a Man Who Knows Better" to Better Every Day.
I know my life will get better every day and I'm putting it out to the universe (and praying for it).
Well, let me tell you about last weekend.
I went to work at my friend's tanning salon so that he could care for his b/f who is recovering from pneumonia. I was grouchy because I was REALLY tired. It ended up going very quickly and I hung out with said friend earlier. We went to Applebee's and then the Spur Lounge with Kevin (who was a nurse at the hospital where Gary's partner was when he had pneumonia). Surprisingly enough, they karaoke guy had Scissor Sisters songs on his playlist. Now let me tell you why this was a surprise. This Spur Lounge is on 55th Ave and Baseline in Laveen, AZ. This was a small farming community that was founded by mormons in the early 20th century. It's now grown to look more like a suburb of Phoenix. Anyway, we had a good time and I got some good applause for my rendition of "I Don't Feel Like Dancin'"

This girl came up to me and told me I had a great voice and then asked if I was gay. I asked what that had to do with it. Then she kind of felt bad, then I felt bad for saying it because she was buzzin'. Anyway, we had a good time and I later did "Laura" and then we left to watch Adam and Steve (which I've seen with Gary WAAAAAAY too many times).
Next day was the Storm car wash and we raised about $400. Not bad for washing a few cars on Saturday.

Happy Monday!